Sunday, May 1, 2005

From The Daily Show:

Next our merry Gaywatch parade floats to Texas... this isn't gonna be good.

The state House of Representatives in Texas recently passed a bill forbidding gay people from adopting foster children. The measure was drafted by state Representative Robert Talton.

"We do not believe that homosexuals and bisexuals should be raising our children."

He's right; you know, those foster kids oughta be raised by their biological abusive or otherwise unfit birth parents. You know, the reason they were taken away from 'em in the first place.

O'course, since homosexuals are sneaky about their lifestyle, the law also allows state officials to investigate whether suspect foster parents are telling the truth about their sexual orientation. Yeah, you know what's interesting? I'm not ****ing making this up. This would be done through a series of trick questions on the screening applications such as:

"Fill in the blank:

32. At first I was afraid, I was _____.
      (A) Petrified
      (B) Don't know"

As one supporter of the bill told CNN, 'This law is based in science!'

"We also have got to look at research that does show that children in same-sex couple homes are eleven times more likely to be abused, sexually. And I think that that is not an issue that can be ignored. It is a proven fact, and that was a research study done in the state of Illinois."

Wow, hard to argue with that. You know, but, uh, Kyra Phillips on CNN still gave opponent Randall Ellis a chance to respond:

"Well, I certainly haven't seen that research, I've certainly never heard anything like that. No child health-care professional that I have ever spoken to, no-one who has access to any of the credible research being done on these issues has ever mentioned anything close to that."

Actually, y'know, he's right; the study that she mentioned is based on the work of one knucklehead who did a Nexis search on the Internet to compile a scientific research. It's a specious claim. And no doubt, Kyra Phillips will cut through the spin and point out the facts.

"It's an interesting debate, a good debate. Thank you both very much."

Really? Good debate? 'Cause it kinda seemed like the one lady was lying. Kinda blows out on her. Kinda seems like she was making **** up, y'know what I'm saying? Co-anchor Carol Lynn, you gonna let her get away with that?

"I have some opinions about that story. You and I are gonna share 'em during the commercial break."

"We'll be talking about it, that's for sure."


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