Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Tuesday Fake Racist Blogging: C.H. Dalton on Ranking the Races



I tried to make out the entire list of races on the blackboard, but couldn't. So I asked Professor Dalton. Here's my letter to him:
Professor Dalton,

In your latest video, "Ranking the Races", I'm afraid that I can't quite make out the list of the lesser races. Here is my guess as to what you've written on your blackboard:
1. Whites
2. Blacks
3. Indians
4. Arabs
5. Hispanics
6. Asians
7. Jews
8. Merpeople
9. Gypsies
10. Cablinasians
11. Gays
12. Women
13. Bratz
14.
15. The elderly
16.
17. Muggles

I'm afraid that I can't quite make out 13-17, and without this knowledge, how am I to know whom I should scorn worse? Could you please provide the full list?

Thank you.

And here's his reply:
Dr. REDACTED:

Yes, I'm afraid the Jew-run Internet doesn't provide the kind of resolution needed to show all the subtleties of my video scholarship. The end of the list should read as such:

13. Bratz
14. Sasquatches
15. The Elderly
16. Draculas
17. Puggles

Muggles are merely "non-Wizards," and therefore not a race. Nor are Wizards -- it's really more of a skill set.

I hope this clears things up for you. Use the list in good health.

Once again, buy the book. Don't make me hurt you.

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